AI ROAST EXAMPLES
Real examples of 3-line roasts. The more specific your input, the sharper the hit. Get yours →
1.Ten years in and you still Google how to center a div — "Senior" is doing all the heavy lifting in your title.2.Your commit history reads: "fix", "fix2", "actually fix", "why" — documentation was coming Q3 of an unspecified year.3.You built three tools nobody uses, one in production nobody touches, including you.
1.You structured your entire personality around an activity that exists because humans no longer need to outrun predators.2.Your friends developed a sixth sense for when you're about to pivot the conversation back to your macros — they are tired.3.The body looks great. Too bad the personality skipped leg day.
🚀THE ENTREPRENEUR
Sarcastic 1.You've been "building something" for three years — a generous description for updating a Notion board in stealth mode.2.Your LinkedIn posts about the "founder journey" are detailed and emotionally affecting — the journey consists primarily of pivoting.3.Somewhere between your third game-changing idea and your first paying customer, the distinction may start to matter.
1.You optimized for freedom and achieved maximum servitude — your boss has zero boundaries and works you at 11pm Saturday.2.Financial planning: alternating between feast and quietly checking whether that tax extension is still valid.3.The dream was the laptop lifestyle — the reality is the same laptop, a worse chair, and no one to fix the printer.
🌙THE NIGHT OWL
Existential 1.You claimed the night as the only part of the day that belongs to you — between 7am and 10am you are a placeholder.2.You've done this every night for years, convinced the mornings will eventually stop being a crisis.3.The cost gets paid in daylight — and you keep signing the check.
NONE OF THESE ARE YOU?
Good. Get your own 3-line custom roast.
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